A while back I happened to stumble upon a blog titled: The Mrs. Oklahoma Pageant. Imagine the surprise I felt when I saw that a quote from my novel was the topic of a post. I stared at the words “Finding your fire” and then read what was said. Lauri Rottmayer, the author of that post, is the Executive Director of the Mrs. Oklahoma International Pageant. As I spent time reading about The Mrs. Oklahoma Pageant and what it truly exemplifies, I was impressed. So much so that I contacted Lauri to thank her for referencing a passage from my novel. Well, Lauri and I hit it off from the get-go, and I knew instantly that her beautiful smile and the sparkle in her eyes revealed the woman she is— charming, wise, and witty.

I asked Lauri if she’d like to share her story here on BRAVA! and she graciously accepted. So here, in Lauri’s own words, is the story behind The Mrs. Oklahoma Pageant.

So, what should that crown really represent?

When most people think of pageants, they think of women strutting across the stage in bathing suits and high heels. Superficial beauty topped by a sparkly crown with about as much substance as cotton candy. It’s thought that the women who compete in pageants are catty, backbiting and selfish. Not so in my world. Not with my titleholders.

It’s not everyone who can say that they are inspired by an assortment of amazing women on a daily basis. But I am blessed. I can say that. As the executive director of the Mrs. Oklahoma International Pageant, every day is inspirational for me. The reason is due to my state and local titleholders.

Our pageant is community service platform based.  Most women have a passion inside that they want to share with the world or at least their local community.  The community service aspect of our pageant offers these women a way to do just that.  A friend of mine shared that in my role, I help women to become more than they already are.  Humbling, yes, but I do feel that I serve as a mentor to the women who choose to participate.

An encourager by nature, gratification comes as I watch each woman travel along the path from when she receives her local title until she competes at the state pageant and beyond.  To watch the confidence and knowledge build as they go from event to event is wonderful.  They come to me with an idea. They are then awarded a title and go to work. The crown and banner opens doors. While it shouldn’t be that way, I learned myself as a younger woman the power of being Mrs. Titleholder. People who wouldn’t normally listen to me all of a sudden wanted to hear what I had to say.

Our ladies are starting non-profit organizations, heading up committees in already established organizations and working with their representatives to enact legislation that will help whatever their chosen cause may be.

Mrs. Oklahoma 2007, Brooke Good, is a young mother of two from Walters.  She herself is a survivor of sexual child abuse and wants girls to know that they can overcome the nightmare of this abuse. She works with the girls at the Marie Detty Girls Home in Lawton. By sharing her story this past year at fundraising events, she helped to raise over $70,000 for the Samaritan Counseling Center in Bartlesville and the Christian Family Counseling Center in Lawton so disadvantaged women can receive counseling for sexual abuse. Brooke continues this work although her reign as Mrs. Oklahoma ended in 2008.

Rachel Roberts of Tulsa, Mrs. Oklahoma 2009, is the mother of four year old Maddy.  After Maddy’s birth, Rachel suffered from severe post partum depression. Since Rachel first entered our system in 2006, she has spent her time speaking to groups about post partum depression awareness and working with her representatives to let them know the importance of their support of the MOTHERS Act. In her farewell speech at the March pageant, she said, “This pageant has helped me turn a very difficult and almost fatal time in my life into something I feel passionate about”.

Our newly crowned Mrs. Oklahoma, Heidi Ducato, was present when her aunt had a heart attack. Not knowing the signs of heart attack in women, Heidi was terrified and didn’t know what to do. After her experience, she wondered, “Is there more that I could be doing?” She wanted to find a way to prevent what she had witnessed from happening to anyone else. She found the American Heart Association and her “HEART fell in love” with the Go Red for Women movement.

Inspirational? You bet.

While these three women are the ones I used as examples of my inspiration, I am equally influenced and inspired by my local titleholders as well. They are all strong, committed women with a passion for the cause they have chosen to represent. I love that they share their excitement and successes with me.

The interesting story that surrounds each woman brings me new inspiration on a daily basis. I don’t have daughters of my own but if I did, I would take any one (or all!) of the amazing women I get the privilege of working with.

I’m proud to be involved in this pageant system and to be able to mentor such an incredible group of women. Oftentimes the women who choose to compete say they are looking to do something for themselves but ultimately they end up doing so much more for the people around them.  Beautiful inside and out, they are raising awareness, raising funds and effecting change in their communities and our state. We laugh together, cry together, and support each other through our collective journeys. It’s awesome!

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The Dixie Divas

One of the terrific perks that comes with being a published author is having the opportunity to connect with other published authors. And, being a Southern writer myself, there’s nothing better than getting to know writers who hail from the South and share their love of Dixie.  When I read the book, Bet Your Bottom Dollar, by Karin Gillespie, I laughed and had myself  gay ole time as I followed the antics of the main characters, Elizabeth, Mavis, and Attalee.

Since that day I’ve been fortunate to have connected with Karin Gillespie (shown in the photo on the left—the pretty, mischievous-looking blond with the twinkle in her eyes), and she’s just as charming and entertaining and funny as her Bottom Dollar Girls series, published by Simon and Schuster.

I recently asked Karin if she’d be willing to share with my readers how the Dixie Divas came to be, and though she’s quite busy, she graciously accepted my invitation. So without further delay, here, in Karin’s own words, is her story …

The Dixie Divas

“When I found out my novel was going to be published I talked to lots of other authors and they scared me to death. “The book signings are killers,” they warned. “Usually the only people who will show up are the events coordinator and your mother.”

I also discovered a book called Mortification: Writers’ Stories of Their Public Shame. How terrifying! I thought there had to be some way to attract an audience to book signings. I talked to a mystery author, Denise Swanson. She traveled with other mystery writer and they called themselves the Deadly Divas. She said they sometimes attracted hundreds of people to their signings.

I decided I would borrow Denise’s idea. Since I was a Southern author, I formed a group called the Dixie Divas. I asked J.L. Miles, Julie Cannon, and Patricia Sprinkle to join me in my venture.

We decided we would have fun book signings. We wear boas and tiaras and other silly accessories. Patty, our mystery writer wears black and yellow crime tape. We tell jokes and stories. No staid, stuffy readings for the Divas. We aim to entertain.

Because we have to watch our pennies we often pile into one car and one hotel room. (Thankfully none of the divas snore.) I call us Thelma and Louise squared.

And yes, for the most part, our signings are wonderful. Sometimes we sell over a hundred books and present to packed houses. The press loves us and we have enjoyed half-page feature article spreads in many Southeastern newspapers, coverage we would have never gotten as solo authors.

But every now and then we have a dud signing. Once we spoke at Cocoa Florida library and the crowd was sparse and composed primarily of elderly retirees. The librarian apologized for the small turnout. A retiree who was listening in said, “You should have been here last week. There was an author who had a long line out the door.”

“Who was the author?” I asked wearily.

“I don’t remember,” said the retiree. “I just remember the name of his book. It was called Overcoming Incontinence.”

So yes, dear friends, we were upstaged by incontinence.

On another occasion we visited a small-town library in Georgia. The cub reporter interviewing us was wet behind the ears. His story had many inaccuracies but the most glaring was the title of his piece, which read, “Dixie Beavers to Visit Local Library.”

We’ve traveled together over three years and we’ve shared a heap of embarrassments as well as countless triumphs. You get to know a lot about people when you swill wine together, share long car rides and sleep in the same bed. The Divas and I have become as close as sisters and we cherish our relationships. I can’t imagine doing signings without them. When I’m with the Divas it doesn’t matter how many people are at our book signings. I know J.L. Miles will make me laugh, Julie Cannon will have a word of encouragement and Patty Sprinkle will give me valuable advice. That’s all I care about. Now it’s less about selling books and more about spending time with my darling Divas.”

Karin’s books can be purchased at fine independent booksellers, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Powell’s, Books-A-Million and many other retailers.

Bio: Karin Gillespie is the author of the Bottom Dollar Girl series and the   founder of A Good Blog is Hard to Find, a group blog for Southern authors.

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Several years ago I read a collection of short stories that I loved. And I do mean loved. So much so that I immediately wrote a review of the book and gave it the that it deserved. I believe in supporting other writers and singing their praises, and this book was so terrific that I wanted to offer the author my full support. Well, out of the blue the author of that wonderful book contacted me and we hit it off from the get-go, chattering back and forth like two happy five-year-olds.

That’s how my new friend, Pamela King Cable, came into my life. I still remember checking out her website after I’d read her book, and I still remember looking at her picture. I had no way of knowing that those gorgeous, intuitive eyes and gentle smile belonged to a woman who would one day be my girlfriend. I’m still amazed at how we connected. Life is full of surprises and blessings.

I recently asked Pam if she’d be willing to share a bit about herself here on my blog, and even though she’s busy working on a new novel (which I cannot wait to get my hands on), she graciously accepted my invitation.

I’m tickled to introduce you to my girlfriend who happens to be  a wonderfully talented writer (and gifted storyteller), Pamela King Cable. Here is her story …

A Writer Remembers

“Swarms of finches, wrens, and other tiny birds peck and hunt for food at feeders that hang outside my kitchen window. Even when I forget to fill the feeders, the birds arrive each morning, hoping to discover their next meal. These tiny birds never give up. They are constant, vigilant, driven. Despite the odds and possible dangers, the birds return every day.

Writers are like tiny birds. We beat our heads against one roadblock after another, writing against enormous odds, hoping and believing our next book will land in the laps of readers and on bestseller lists across the country. But even after decades into our career, we discover we must sometimes recall what made us write in the first place and the courage it took.

My granddaddy was a coal miner, but my father escaped the mines, went to college and moved his family to Ohio to work for the rubber companies. I spent every weekend as a child, traveling back to the West Virginia Mountains. My memories of my childhood run as deep as the Appalachian creeks and swimming holes I swam in as a child. My career as a writer was born in the dust laden coal towns of the early 60s.

For me, it is within sanctuaries of brick and mortar, places of clapboard and revival tents transcending time and space, that characters hang ripe and ready for picking.

From the primitive church services of mountain clans to the baptisms and sacraments of robed priests in great cathedrals and monasteries. From hardworking men and women who testify in the run-down churches of coal camps to the charismatic high-dollar high-tech evangelicals in televised mega-churches of today. Therein lie stories of unspeakable conflict, the forbidden, and often, the unexplained.

As a writer, it is my desire to transport a reader’s mind—but my deepest passion is to pierce a reader’s heart. The topic of faith, for me, has a way of doing that like nothing else.

My mother says I cut my teeth on the back of a church pew. I grew up in revival tents, tabernacles, and eventually in grand cathedrals with TV cameras rolling. In the early days, revivals were as exciting as the carnival coming to town and evangelists were royalty. I experienced a world from the sublime to the bizarre. It caused me to weave religion, spirituality, and the mysterious into my stories. Stories that hint to an ancient bridge where the real and the supernatural meet.

Many of my stories are based on truth, shreds of truth, people I’ve known, places I’ve been, and of course history plays a great part in some stories, like Coal Dust On My Feet; a love story set amidst the longest and most violent coal strike in the history of our country. It is truth and fiction.

Mother was a skilled storyteller without knowing it. All I wanted to do when I grew up was duplicate her life. I loved her southern accent and heritage and I felt neither imprisoned nor put off by it. But the most precious gift she gave me was a love for the written world, be it the word of God or of Mother Goose. Mom was my inspiration, and one day I picked up a pencil in the sixth grade and wrote my first story. I haven’t stopped since. The next forty years played into my storytelling, and after surviving life’s heartaches and hardships, it gave me plenty to write about.

A writer’s life is a solitary life. We hope we possess raw talent, unique originality, and gut emotional appeal. We raise the stakes on each and every page and hope, and pray, and believe that some day we’re blessed a bit of luck.

Is it worth the struggle? You bet it is. All you need, is the courage of a tiny bird.

Remember when you tackled that first story, essay, article, poem? That was courage. Courage is not confidence, nor the opposite of meekness. It’s feeling a measure of confidence, and then acting on those feelings. It’s a quality of spirit that enables you to face the moment, whatever comes, and keep going.

Courage allows you to see, hear, smell, and taste things as they really are. Courage makes you face facts, unfiltered by rosy daydreams. Courage frees you to be creative. It pushes you to prepare for the unknown without obsessing over it. To be open to what may come.

A writer can’t be open to new ideas if dazed and confused by fear. Courage enables you to be prepared and wide awake in every situation.

There were times in my youth I didn’t write because I was afraid of failing. I didn’t prepare for success because I was afraid it might happen. I didn’t look, really look, into my past because I was afraid of what I might find. As I grow older, I don’t give myself those options. Not anymore.

Fear is passive-aggressive. It’s the lazy writer’s excuse for not moving forward. It’s a great immobilizer, an avoidance technique. Fear puts the focus on what we might encounter, distracts us from what’s actually there. Courage empowers a writer to pay attention.

In the end, a writer can do without a lot of things. Remembering your journey is not one of them. Courage is the other.”

—Pamela King Cable

Southern Fried Women, Pam’s terrific book of short stories, can be purchased at Indy booksellers, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Powell’s, and other fine retailers.

Pam’s Bio:

Pam was born a coal miner’s granddaughter, and claims a tribe of wild Pentecostals and storytellers raised her. Her award-winning stories, articles, and essays have appeared in magazines, anthologies, and newspapers in several states. Pam’s passion and inspiration on overcoming life’s insurmountable obstacles is evident when she speaks and within the pages of her collection of short stories, Southern Fried Women, which was a finalist in Fiction and Literature-Short Story, Best Books of 2006 Book Awards, USABookNews.com, and a finalist for ForeWard Magazine’s Book of the Year 2006.

Pam has appeared on TV, radio, and has been a keynote or guest speaker at regional and national writing groups, Rotary Clubs, Kiwanis, Women’s Centers, Junior Leagues, and many churches throughout the South. Also, in 2006 Pam was invited by the First Lady of West Virginia and the First Lady of Mississippi to speak to the people of Charleston and Jackson.

She is currently working on her third book, The Sanctum.

Pam’s Website – www.pamelacable.com
Pam’s Blog – www.southernfriedwoman.blogspot.com

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I first met Ginger at The Margaret Mitchell House in Atlanta, Georgia. While giving an author presentation, I scanned the audience and noticed a stunning redhead with a gorgeous smile. Later in the evening while I was signing books, she introduced herself and we hit it off immediately. Well known for her radio show, Book Talk With Ginger, and, for her book, Back on Top; Fearless Dating After Divorce, Ginger is the real deal—a dynamo with energy to spare and a quick, inquisitive mind. When she told me about her life and her writing, I knew I wanted to feature her here, and Ginger graciously accepted my invitation.

I’m so pleased to introduce you to the delightful Ginger Emas Schlanger, and here, in her own words, is her story …

“I’ve been writing stories for as long as I can remember, inspired by my 7^th grade English teacher who, after reading one of my short stories, told me I was a strong writer. I cringe at that story now (yes, torn and tattered, I saved that year’s anthology), but sometimes it only takes one person to believe in you and motivate you for the rest of your career.  I began mine in Charlotte, NC, working for IBM as a magazine writer, then editor. Who knew corporations needed so much writing? After six years I moved to Atlanta, Georgia. I told everyone I was moving because I wanted to open my own communications firm (which I did), but the truth was, I had dated all of the eligible young men in city of Charlotte and the surrounding counties, and I needed a larger pool.

Which leads me to my topic: sort of a Sex and the City-meets-I Love Lucy. I’m the author of the recently-released book, Back on Top: Fearless Dating After Divorce. After 13 years of marriage (and 14 years of couples therapy) I became the first person in my family’s history to divorce.  Suddenly single, I thought I’d simply pick up where I left off nearly two decades earlier. But while I was changing diapers, the dating world had gone to the wolves – and apparently, the cougars.

My first date after my divorce was excruciatingly awkward. When I got home that night, I did what writers do — I wrote about it. Finding both the humanity and humor in that first date saved me from swearing off men altogether. That story was published in a women’s magazine, along with several others that I wrote during my first year of post-divorce dating. Unaware that this is not how things happen in the publishing world, a publisher read my articles and called to ask if I would write a book on the topic. Something funny, hopeful, helpful, snarky … And that’s how Back on Top was born.

During the writing, I interviewed dozens of men and women and realized there was a strong connection around this topic. We all love to talk about love — the beginning of it, the pursuit of it, the heat of it, the end of it, the meaning of it. I also learned that there was a lot of uncertainty among recently-divorced women about dating “rules:” online dating etiquette, dating with kids, dating safety, when to have sex (if we’d ever have sex again) – none of us who were dating again seemed to have a clue. So I took it upon myself to learn and stumble, get back up and back on top — and share.

Beyond the humor and advice, I think my book offers women acceptance and validation. There’s no judging from me, because believe me, I’ve been there, too. I’ve made so many mistakes, learned from (some of) them, only to make an entirely different mistake the next Saturday night. Today I host Girlfriend Makeovers and post-divorce dating workshops where I hear stories that many women have never spoken about before … they tell me they feel a sense of failure. They think their love life is over … they wish they had made different choices … they worry that they didn’t try hard enough … they think they went too wild or not wild enough, and that they’ll be judged. My goal is to support women the best way I can, and often that’s through the lens of laughter and a girlfriend-to-girlfriend honesty. It’s how I’ve always tip-toed through my own life’s challenges.

I write a column for www.Sharewik.com and www.Skirt.com, sharing what I know: the experiences of a divorced working mom who only a few years ago was baffled by the terms “MILF” and “Cougar” and who is doing her best to stay sane while co-parenting with my ex to raise our teenage son. I write about my previous dating escapades as well as my current relationship with a man significantly younger than I am. I talk about the women and men I continue to meet, and the amazing grace with which so many people handle difficult transitions. And I mostly tell stories of my ex, and the well-worth-it benefits of developing a true friendship after divorce. Most people think we’re a little crazy, but I am thrilled to have the family of four I’ve always wanted … only it looks a little different than what I’d imagined: my boyfriend, my ex, my son and me.

I am always excited to interview authors for Book Talk with Ginger, part of Radio Sandy Springs in Atlanta, Georgia and a top radio site on America’s Web Radio. A full hour of your favorite writers live every Monday, 1 – 2 p.m. EST. Please email me at ginger@backontopthebook.com with suggestions of authors you’d like to hear, or if you are a writer who’d like to chat with me, please let me know. I’d love to have you listen to the show, and email or call in to win copies of free books! You can also download the show every Tuesday and play it on your phone or media player while you walk, exercise, carpool, volunteer, work – all the things women do all at one time! You can hear Beth’s interview by visiting the site, scrolling down to Archives, and selecting 3/1/10, Beth Hoffman.”

Ginger’s book, Back on Top: Fearless Dating After Divorce is available at your local independent bookseller and electronically through Amazon and Barnes & Noble.

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I’ll bet many of you recognize this beautiful face … yep, it belongs to my friend and fellow novelist, the very talented Claire Cook. With six novels under her belt and another on the way to publication, you might assume (as I first did) that Claire began writing when she was in her 20s. But no, that’s not the case. Claire, like so many talented authors, did not go after her dream when she stepped into adulthood. Claire’s story of how and when she finally went after her life-long dream is truly inspiring and I asked if she’d share it here on BRAVA!  Claire graciously agreed and I’m so glad she did.

With great pleasure I’d like to introduce you to the wise, witty, and delightfully down to earth Claire Cook!

Here, in Claire’s own words, is her story …

Minivan Magic

“I remember the exact moment. I was sitting in my minivan outside my daughter’s swim practice at 5 AM, and it hit me that I might live my whole life without once going after my lifelong dream of writing a novel.

I’d majored in film and creative writing in college, and fully expected that the moment I graduated I’d go into labor and a brilliant novel would emerge, fully formed, like giving birth.

It didn’t happen. Looking back, I can see that I had to live my life so I’d have something to write about, and if I could give my younger self some good advice, it would be not to beat myself up for the next couple of decades.

But I did. I pretended I wasn’t feeling terrible about not having the guts to write a novel. I followed my two children to school as a teacher, where I taught everything from multicultural games and dance, to open ocean rowing, to creative writing.

And then one day I was 44, and the procrastination was suddenly more painful than actually writing a book. I didn’t tell a soul, but during one long cold New England winter I wrote a rough draft in my minivan in the pool parking lot.

Amazingly, it sold to the first publisher who asked to read it, and my first novel was published when I was 45. At 50, I walked the red carpet at the Hollywood premiere of the adaptation of my second novel, Must Love Dogs. I’m now the bestselling author of six novels, with my sixth, The Wildwater Walking Club, just out in paperback, and a seventh, Seven Year Switch, coming in June.

Midlife rocks. I love sharing my story because I think it gives hope to so many women with buried dreams just like mine. If I can do it, so can you.”

Claire’s newest novel, Seven Year Switch, will be released in June. I had the pleasure of reading this terrific novel earlier this year and writing an endorsement for it too. I highly recommend it!

Claire’s previous novel, The Wildwater Walking Club, is a real treat.  It’s now available in paperback and includes a readers guide, Q&A, and a teaser chapter from the book she’s working on right now, Summer Blowout.

Please take a moment and find out more about Claire and what she’s up to at ClaireCook.com.

You can also follow Claire on Twitter by clicking here: And on Facebook

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